Dancing in New York with Santo Rico, Sept-Dec 2007 |
![]() Left to right: Carmen, Azucena, Liz (Santo Rico) All of a sudden the realization came to me that I was alone; I was all by my lonesome self. Carlos, my boyfriend, had so lovingly stayed with me an extra night after the New York Salsa Congress to help me find a place to stay. But he was now gone, and so were my friends Nuno, Elisabeth, and Richard who had been with me for the past 3 days. They were all back in Austin, TX. And a cold feeling of utter loneliness came over me; and yet I was determined to succeed, “to make it work” in this city of light and people from all walks of life.
I couldn’t help but question, was I making the right decision? Was I moving forward or was this a step in the wrong direction?
You have to believe in yourself when no one else does.
Often times we get caught up in the routine of our daily lives, in the titles we use to introduce ourselves, the clothes we wear, the car we drive, the house we live in, the people we hang out with, that we forget who we really are on the inside. We forget who we are regardless of our outer achievements and material possessions. When we are removed from our current living situation, we may encounter that without these “things” that define us, we get a glimpse of the unchangeable part of ourselves; the intangible part of ourselves that needs no external validation to be and to flourish. Sometimes when we are removed from our comfort zone, we get an opportunity to evaluate whether we actually meant to steer the boat of our life in the direction in which we’re headed.
Dancing in New York and under the direction of Tomas Guerrero, the director of Santo Rico Dance Company was by all means an amazing opportunity. On the other hand, I realize that my finances would not have allowed me to have the comfortable living in New York that I had enjoyed for so many years in Austin. I also came to see in full flesh my deep-seated desire to continue to grow Jazzy Dance Company (which I co-direct with my partner Carlos Leon) and to bring new knowledge to the Salsa scene in Austin. They say that sometimes we have to leave to come back; and I now relate to that. Though I would have been happy to continue dancing with Santo Rico in New York, my heart was and is in Austin with my people and my friends. I thank Tomas for giving the opportunity of a lifetime and for teaching me the Santo Rico way of dancing. I also thank my friends, fans, and supporters here in Austin that always believed in me and welcomed me with open arms. Above all, I thank Carlos, for not giving up on me and for supporting me every step of the way, even when it meant we'd be apart. Sometimes love is all we need as our guide to know where home is. Would I do it again? Probably yes. Some things we absolutely must do only to see what other doors open for us. I knew I had to give this opportunity a chance and I am happy that I did. For in the end, all we have is experiences lived, moments shared, and the peace of mind of having lived and done all the things we wanted to do, be, or have. As Deepak Chopra once said, "Never pass up a chance to see what the Universe has in store for you."
P.S. If you want to watch me perform with Santo Rico, check out our video gallery! |